Anyone who’s had a hand in the customer experience has heard an odd customer question or request – and managed to keep a straight face, answering it as professionally as possible. Well, you don’t have to keep a straight face when you read these off-kilter requests and questions.
Of course, in most cases, customers don’t mean to ask the obscure. What they actually want just comes out wrong.
In their words
We’ve pulled 21 seemingly silly questions from a variety of print and online resources. Enjoy.
- To a grocery store clerk: “Where are your vegan apples?
- To a hostess: “What’s the weather like on the patio?”
- To a waiter: “Now, the baked potato, what is that?”
- To a convenience store clerk: “What would you do if I robbed you?”
- To a technician: “If I install 32 bits Window twice, will it become 64 bit?”
- To a waitress at a diner: “Is the bacon chicken or beef?”
- To a movie theater attendant: “What comes with your large popcorn, large drink combo?”
- To a zookeeper referring to a black bear: “That polar bear is filthy. Why don’t you clean it?”
- To an information technology pro: “What time does the Internet shut down?”
- To a waiter at a pancake house: “Can I get the never-ending pancakes to go?”
- To a book store clerk: “Do you have the Bible here? The one that Jesus wrote?”
- To a jeweler: “Can you combine these two diamonds into one for me?”
- To a pet shop owner: “Can I return this hamster? It’s neither friendly or cuddly.”
- To a travel agent: “The picture in the brochure showed it was sunny. Why is it raining?”
- To a pizza shop clerk: “How much do your $5 pizzas cost?”
- To a lawn care provider: “Do you come to my house to mow the grass?”
- To a Christmas tree farm attendant: “So what are these trees made of?”
- To an accountant: “Can I claim my wife as a dependent? What good is it being married if you can’t get a tax deduction for her?”
- To an amusement park attendant: “So you’re telling me that just because my ticket says it is non-refundable, I can’t get my money back?”
- To a bus driver: “Do you know where this bus goes?”
- To a fast food drive-thru employee: “Can I get my order to go?”
